Breinthewild

A.K.A. one of the finest headlines I’ve ever read. Just look at it:

After high-speed chase over border, Oregon police seize meth and … invasive snails

The story within is every bit as wild as you might imagine. From police saying they finished the chase by finding quote “a small amount of meth and in plain view, several snails” to this announcement once the arrest was over:

“Police Chief Romero said fish and wildlife folks were notified, but that he was not sure where the snails were being housed for the time being.”

(Where are the snails, Chief? The People want to know).

An entomologist later in the article surmises the slimy boys in question are “European brown garden snails” (sweet) which are regarded as an invasive species (significantly less sweet). He also apparently ‘guided’ the officers with details on snail regulations since they quote, “didn’t want to seize these snails without knowing the rules.” (Amazing).

But by far my favorite part of the article was discovering the existence of Oregon’s “Approved Invertebrates List” A.K.A. all the creepy-crawlies you CAN legally bring into the state. The only snail listed is, apparently, the Spike-topped apple snail. (Who knew?) Other items include the Giant African millipede, the Pink toed tarantula, and Predatory six-spotted thrips along with an assortment of about 40 beetles. Most of these also have limits on what you can use them for, be it education, as pets (or pet food) and much more. Honey production, funnily enough, is one of the options, as is ‘other’ (though I didn’t see it used). And if your favorite invertebrate didn’t make the list, you can also contact the Oregon Department of Agriculture to petition on their behalf. So there you go.